Ad Discendum, Non Ad Docendum

Yuri Leikind to ror2ru:

У меня как у трудового иммигранта с очень ограниченным кругом русскоязычного общения сложилось такое впечатление, что в русскоязычных группах всегда больше агрессии. И, если честно, мне этого не хватает :-)

Подписался недавно на эту группу, и смотрю - товарисч задает вопрос, а что такое Edge, а ему отвечают в духе, ты че, мудак, RTFM бля, и википедию читай. И так хорошо мне стало, как домой приехал :-)

ЗачЁд %)

Привожу первую часть из найденого на просторах интернета текстовичка под названием computer-scince.txt.

Не уверен в авторстве текста Romuald’а Żyłła, но найден был в его закромах

ASSEMBLER is a language. Any language that can take a half-dozen keystrokes and compile it down to one byte of code is all right in my books. Though for the REAL programmer, assembler is a waste of time. Why use a compiler when you can code directly into memory through a front panel.

BASIC is to computer programming as “qwerty” is to typing.

BASIC is not a language. It’s a plot to sucker poor unsuspecting consumers into believing that they should buy a computer because ANYONE can learn how to program.

Real Programmers don’t use BASIC. In fact, *no* programmers use BASIC after reaching puberty.

C is almost a real language. (see assembler) Even the name sounds like it’s gone through an optimizing compiler. Get rid of all of those stupid brackets and we’ll talk. (see LISP)

DEBUGGING – Removing the needles from the haystack.

FORTRAN is not a language. It’s a way of turning a multi-million dollar mainframe into a $50 programmable scientific calculator.

LOGO is not a language. It’s a way to simulate ‘skid marks’ made by turtles with serious bowel control problems.

MIPS: Meaningless Indicator of Processor Speed.

PASCAL is not a language. It was an experiment combining the flexibilty of C with that of a drug-crazed penguin. It is also the ‘language’ of choice of many CS professors who aren’t up to handling REAL programming. Hence, it is not a language.

PROGRAMMER – Red eyed, mumbling mammal capable of conversing with inanimate monsters.

Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.

If you put garbage in a computer nothing comes out but garbage. But this garbage, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and none dare criticize it.

It is later than you think.

If a program is useful, it must be changed.

If a program is useless, it must be documented.

Your fault – core dumped.

You still need the last file you removed.

Особенно понравилось о FORTRAN’е и PASCAL’е

© Michael Klishin:

Самый человечный мануал “по линуксу”,
как ни странно, FreeBSD Handbook.

Даже завел отдельный раздел, ибо пора…

Любой рельсовый проект, останавливаясь в развитии, срастается со своей версией рельс.

Произносить с интонацией фразы “Умирая, участник проекта ‘Разгром’ обретает имя.” из Бойцовского Клуба

Я тоже продал все Бубны, дудки, флаги, сдал бутылки, на Фидо забил, поставил SuSE, завел девку, и купил машину.

(c)

Выдержка из rules:

Teams should be comprised of between one and four individuals. No more than four people are allowed on a team. To be eligible, teams must register at least 1 week prior to the start of the competition. No robots or aliens. However, team members should feel free to dress as robots or aliens.

…живой программист на Cobol‘е

I’m an xbase (dbase/FoxBase & Pro/Clipper) and cobol programmer from way back. (Been writing code since 1980) Believe it or not, I make a VERY nice living maintaining legacy code.